Nice work Curtis. I enjoyed spending the day with this group, slinging a little paint and later showing them around the Bratislava castle.
Having been raised in a family which valued faith, church and hope in the eternal, it has been quite natural over the years to assume that my grasp of God’s character is valid and sufficient. Through the passage of time one thing has become clearly evident to me, because of the incomprehensible depth of His nature, I need a constant and on-going revelation of who God is. The result of such a process, I have learned, is a deeper knowing of God’s true character, by the power of the Holy Spirit, which has led me to a more intimate, trusting embrace of His relentless love for me. And as I look at the horizon of my faith journey well off into the distance I can see a vast and limitless path leading ever deeper into the heart of God and His unsearchable love. In addition I have also discovered that part of the answer to the question’ why do I go in search of another love’ lies in the way I was designed by my creator. My heart has been wired to desire love and acceptance of my fellow human beings. I want to feel connected to other people and want them to desire to be connected to me. This is, of course, all very natural and healthy in the context for which it was designed. The problem for me, and I suspect many others, is I am unable at times to keep this natural desire in its proper context. I find myself putting too much importance or emphasis on the acceptance or approval of others which ultimately diminishes my capacity for receiving and embracing God’s love. God desires and expects that He will be given the most prominent place in my heart. And He has every right to have that expectation. God is perfectly deserving to have all of my love and affection, mind, soul, body and strength. But with true love comes freedom and certainly God has given it. The freedom to give my heart to whomever I choose and the freedom to embrace or reject any love offered to me, including God’s.
1 Comments:
Shalom Scott,
While reading your intriguing thoughts of Abba’s love I couldn’t resist engaging in the dialogue. I am captivated by this journey of the heart; I long to be a recipient of God’s amazing love without any merit of my own. However, I am not accustomed to receiving without doing. It astounds me that Yahweh takes me back again and again despite my failings’ and floundering. As the song expresses so well:
Not because of who I am.
But because of what you’ve done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who you are.
Perhaps you have read works by Brennan Manning; his writings go straightway to the heart of Abba’s love; he pierces the paradoxes of our Father’s rich unabashed love for us and our futile struggle to win His approval.
“The only way to survive is to know that God loves me as I am and not as I should be, that He loves me beyond worthiness and unworthiness, beyond fidelity and infidelity; that He loves me in the morning sun and in the evening rain, without caution, regret, boundary, limit or breaking point; that no matter what I do He can't stop loving me. When I am really in conscious communion with the reality of the wild, passionate, relentless, stubborn, pursuing, tender love of Christ for me, then it's not that I have to or I got to or I must or I should or I ought; suddenly, I want to change because I know how deeply I'm loved!
The biggest mistake I can make is to say to God, "Lord, if I change, you'll love me, won't you?" The Lord's reply is always, "Wait a minute; you've got it all wrong. You don't have to change so I'll love you; I love you so you'll change." I simply expose myself to the love that is everything and have an immense, unshakable, reckless, raging confidence that God loves me so much He'll change me and fashion me into the child that He always wanted me to be.”
The musician writes the queries I tend to ask in the face of my own fear, realization or perceived rejection, failure and inadequacy. The fact that I ask exposes my limited understanding or perhaps reluctant acceptance of my Savior’s unconditional love for me just as I am.
‘What if I climbed that mountain, what if I swam to that shore
What if every battle was victorious then would you love me more
What if I were everyone’s first choice, what if I went farther than before
What if I stood high above the rest then would you love me more
You say I belong to you apart from the things I do
You say I belong to you I’m in awe of why you do
What if I ignored the hand that fed me, what if I forgot to confess
What if I stumbled down that mountain then would you love me less
Lord would you love me less
What if I were everyone’s last choice what if I mixed in with the rest
What if I failed what I passed before then would you love me less
Lord would you would you love me less…
You say I belong to you apart from the things I do
You say I belong to you I’m in awe of why you do
What have I done to deserve your son sent to die for me’
We could go on: does God love you more for serving in Slovakia; would he love you less if you had said no? For me time has come to return to IN for awhile; will God love me more if I go or less if I stay? It seems in our intellect we know the merit of God’s love rests on him and not on us; so then, why do we have such trouble embracing his love in the midst of our faults, scars and misgivings. The following authors help shed some light on this for me:
“Knowing God, then, has to be about more than adhering to a set of principles or behaviors—even though, goodness knows, it is tempting to reduce it all to that. But anyone can learn the tenets of belief in God or follow a set of rules. What melts our wills is a hope much larger, one that seems too good to be true. It is the hope that the One who spoke the worlds into being would want us.” (P. Rineheart)
Eldredge says “What he is after is us—our laughter, our tears, our dreams, our fears, our heart of hearts. Remember his lament in Isaiah, that though his people were performing all their duties, “their hearts are far from me.” How few of us truly believe this. We’ve never been wanted for our heart, our truest self, not really, not for long. The thought that God wants our heart seems too good to be true.”
Scott, may your love walk with our Lord awaken your heart to the heartbeat of Abba Father and lead you to experience His exquisite love in ways you have never known.
-Linda C.
Post a Comment
<< Home